The Subtle Side of Conscious Language

You’re flying above a work for a structural edit or wading through the waters of a stylistic edit, when you come across a scene or a phrase that makes you pause. Is this potentially harmful? Should I encourage the author to use conscious language here?

Karen Yin, in The Conscious Style Guide, suggests that “conscious language can be used whenever we want to be aware, mindful and intentional” (31). As editors following the Professional Editorial Standards 2024, we should know that “certain terms and phrases may be inadvertently harmful,” and know “who is excluded from the material” because they are part of a marginalized group. We trust that our clients want to be mindful and when we find instances of potentially harmful or exclusionary language, it’s our role to remove, amend or flag the “biased, non-inclusive and offensive material.

What do we do when bias isn’t obvious, and the effects are reproducing subtle societal prejudices?

What is written and what is hidden

Picture an ensemble-cast story in which every male character is dressed in cool colours like blue and green, has traditionally masculine interests and skills and only has male friends. Meanwhile, every female character is dressed in warm colours like pink and yellow, has traditionally feminine interests and only has female friends. Though there are no grand statements that “women belong in the kitchen,” somehow, they all seem to end up there.

Alternatively, you might see something like this: an author profiles people for a set of short interviews, beginning each with a quick description. Descriptions of thin, gender-conforming and abled white people are breezed through, while fatness, gender nonconformity, disability or racialized features are examined in detail.

Everyone absorbs unconscious biases and unconsciously reproduces them. But every reproduction can actively harm marginalized readers by further entrenching the societal bias that affects every aspect of their lives.

To protect reader experience, an editor needs to be aware of societal bias pushing men and women to look, dress and behave in certain prescribed ways, and how an ensemble cast of men’s men and Stepford wives reinforces that. An editor needs to be aware of the stigma surrounding racialized features, and how describing in detail the shape of a Black person’s nose and mouth while calling a white person “tall and brown-haired” and moving on reproduces that stigma.

But advocating for harmed readers can be a complicated process. An author might not feel that their individual creative choices could do harm. They might feel you’re imposing your worldview on them, or  interpret your suggestions as their moral failing and be insulted or self-flagellate.

Begin with the audience

Editing for conscious language may feel more personal to the author, but it’s no different than any aspect of a stylistic edit. Addressing biases is done not to pass judgement but to serve the audience.

When leaving a comment in the margins, instead of, “You’re reinforcing harmful gender stereotypes” and, “You’re treating descriptions of the Black interviewee differently than the White interviewee,” opt for, “These characters currently read as a unified group. Your readers may better connect with them if they’re given more distinct personalities.” and, “Some readers may focus on the incongruities of how you describe your interviewees, instead of the interview itself.” Focusing on the audience may be a smoother first step if you’re still establishing a relationship with your client. Still, many authors will appreciate you bringing instances of unconscious bias to their attention. Demonstrating that conscious language and craft go hand in hand establishes you as a trustworthy partner in your client’s work. 

The goal is not to hide conscious language edits in more craft-centred ones as you would a child’s medicine in apple sauce. The goal is to begin the conversation from a place of mutual respect and demonstrate the benefits of recognizing potential harm. 

We do not possess innate knowledge 

Unconscious bias occurs because we cannot know everything. The beauty of an author – editor relationship is the pooling of knowledge, perspectives and experiences for the benefit of the project. By examining these complicated scenarios and sharing them with your clients, you can better address “biased, non-inclusive and offensive material.”

Have you encountered subtle or complicated forms of biased material in your editing work? How have you addressed it? Share your strategies in the comments below.

About the co-author

Student of literature; lover of stories; descriptivist; infodumper; overthinker; anarchic pedant. Alex Elcombe is happiest behind the screen, behind the fourth wall, behind the proverbial curtain, invisibly connecting author to reader in search of that ever-elusive moment of truly knowing what someone else means. Find them at alex-elcombe-edits.com. 

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